Make way for the new man

Make way for the new

Man as the old man has

Died, repenting in God.

A new man

He has left the old ways

Or in the process of

Doing it as he repents.

Lose-Lose Situations

There’s a prophecy by two people, one of them being an ex-Satanist, where he said that the UN is considering a one-world religion and this one really is Islam. This is very politically incorrect to say this out loud, especially in an increasingly pluralistic west where people are socialised to treat diverse beliefs, cultures, needs and lifestyles as equally legitimate to one another. And a good number of Muslims are very sensitive to Islamophobia, but especially western Muslims at that. I feel that unless if we’re talking about countries that have long-standing Muslim majority populations like Turkey, Albania, Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan and Azerbaijan, this is a very touchy subject in places like the United Kingdom, Germany, Italy, France, Sweden, Spain, Norway and the Netherlands.

These are all countries with long-standing Christian majority populations, though they’re increasingly secularised and feel compelled to accomodate the needs of diverse communities, individuals, lives and stances on things, one of them being Islam and a good number of immigrants going there come from Muslim-majority countries like Turkey as well as former European possessions like Morocco, Lebanon, Libya and Algeria. In less politically correct countries like China and Russia, they could easily be seen as undermining their own cultural heritages and the like this way. When it comes to the twin realities of both the acculturation gap and third culture kids, it’s going to be a lose-lose in a way because you have immigrants and their children wanting to retain their cultures, but also feel pressured to fit into the host culture.

Not to mention the children will readily assimilate into the host cultures because this is happening in their formative years, a lot to readily acclimatise themselves to the host cultures’ particularities and sensibilities. It’s like if you come from Malaysia and you and your family move to Britain for good, but your child readily catches up with their peers (or deliberately does this because they don’t want to get bullied themselves). Even if they manage to retain the ancestral culture as much as they can to the best of their abilities, the usual result is more in-between the migrant land and the ancestral homeland. They are not necessarily criminals, but they are often caught between a rock and a hard place. In between striving to remain connected to their ancestral homelands and adjusting to a place with different sensibilities and mindsets.

It’s not a stretch to even consider the likes of Daddy G, 3D, Skin, Maxim Reality and Mel B as third culture kids all grown up, because their own parents (or one of her own parents in Mel B’s case) were from the Caribbean who moved to the UK in search of a better life and higher payrate. Not to mention Britain colonised the likes of modern day Barbados, St Kitts and Jamaica, bringing over enslaved Africans there and forming their own cultures independent of the African kingdoms and empires they came from over time. Somebody else had a prophecy about this matter, though it was definitely already a thing in some countries like Britain, it was also a forthcoming phenomenon at the time when she prophesised this to Emmanuel Minos, who pretty much transcribed everything that she said.

Both Norway and Iceland are rather remarkable cases as both of them were kind of backwater countries before, then getting rich (Norway in the 1970s, Iceland in the 1990s) and eventually witnessing a surge in immigrants themselves. Both of them were colonies of other countries, but most especially Denmark for quite a stretch in time. And then there’s the prophesised xenophobia, which came to pass in the years hence. Or for another matter, Ireland just the same. (Also the thing she said about infidelity and cohabitation has been fulfilled, but in the case with the former it manifests as ethical nonmonogamy, even if such forms existed for as long as people marry divorcees whose ex-spouses are still alive.) This situation has already happened before in Albania, Turkey and even Spain for a while, though if Islamisation were to succeed, then the most likely scenario is that the rest of Europe will look like these two instead.

Not that Christianity will entirely disappear there, as God will kept a remnant for as long as he wills to, but I feel we might see a kind of growth in underground or crypto-Christianity instead. This has been the case in both Albania and Turkey for years, to the point where it’s speculated that some Muslim communities are crypto-Christian in practise. This could befall in Europe as well as in Nigeria to some extent, even when Christianity doesn’t entirely disappear there, it will take on an underground character of sorts. Not entirely gone but more like what Christianity’s like in China, Vietnam, Malaysia and Indonesia in the sense of being both visible and kind of very much outsiders to the prevailing beliefs, even if one could argue that it’s already the case as Europe’s apparently very secular. Christianity might still be around in some form, though more underground than it was before, especially with Islamisation growing throughout Europe.

Especially in the years to come as well as in Nigeria.

About a certain fan

There’s actually a Backstreet Boys fan who was on her way to becoming a practising Christian, but this didn’t go as expected as she remained devoted to the Backstreet Boys, admittedly I do have problems with idolatry every now and then, sometimes as an attempt to do good like not getting mad at somebody and stuff, but still getting judged for this before many times over. It’s actually kind of unfortunate that Brian Littrell never seemed concerned for her welfare, or at times Jenny Berggren towards some fans, even though this obsession has gotten out of hand for her that she ended up doing a lot of bad things. Or for another matter this AOB fan, though he’s not a Christian for now, I even prayed to God to help Jenny Berggren make her fans worship him.

My attempts backfired, even when I wanted others to do right by God, I guess I was relying on my own strength a lot back then. Even then I feel it would be kind of terrible for somebody like Jenny Berggren to turn a blind eye to this, to the point where I have to pray for her to stop enabling this in a way, to the best of my abilities, and also repent herself lest there be a repeat of what has happened to her before. There was a time when a stalker came to them and killed their grandmother, traumatising her older sister Malin (and the middle child between the Berggren siblings, the oldest being Jonas) for life. Given I have a fear of the past coming back again and again, since I often have negative experiences of those sorts of things (missing sermons and stuff), I do wish for Berggren to stop or minimise this herself, to keep herself close to God.

And to make sure her sister’s mental health will recover well enough, that she better stop making her fans make idols out of her and her band. So I did a lot to pray for her this morning and to make sure she has to stop doing this, lest it get into her head again and risk something bad again like the last time it happened before (I often know this from experience). Or even Zac Hanson for another matter, even Shane Lynch is no different as he’s in the same position as they are. But it still goes to show you that it’s better to live for God and make others do the same with their conduct (it’s kind of hard in my case) and also actively praying for them just the same, which is clear that Brian Littrell is paying lip service to God at this point. One could pray for him to repent, but I’m afraid it’s hard holding him accountable when his fans continue to worship him and his band, that it would be better for all the Backstreet Boys to get the boot and kick the bucket.

Don’t let a rebellious person live. So said the Lord about the Backstreet Boys and why those in Hanson, Ace of Base and Boyzone need to stop enabling this sort of thing soon enough, lest they all get the boot together just the same.

Something sick behind the scenes

Celestial said that the Backstreet Boys might have really been abused by their manager on video, or at least some of them were, and even if Lou Pearlman really didn’t molest Nick Carter himself he would’ve been inappropriate to him in some other way. That’s by encouraging him to watch porn, which means he developed a habit of watching porn because of him. Kaya Jones had the misfortune of encountering him enjoying this sort of thing in person, that he’d get real angry at her to the point of destroying walls, makes me wonder why he ended up this way. Coupled with being really entitled to get any woman he wants and with him possibly cheating on his wife with a fan (which all the Backstreet Boys will turn out to be doing this just the same), it seems being in this environment by merely watching porn alone would’ve negatively affeced his perception of women.

The rest of Celestial’s post seems to indulge in a kind of kink shaming to some people, but there’s still the possibility that somebody’s favourite celebrity could’ve been abused by somebody else in the entertainment industry. Maybe not all of them but it does explain certain things like what Jane Carter, Nick’s mum, thought that Lou Pearlman did something inappropriate to him at the time. I even said that even when no real sexual abuse occurred between the two, Pearlman would still be inappropriate to him by encouraging him to watch porn, and when Carter grew up he kept the habit well onto adulthood if Jones’s testimony is any indication. There was also an expose by Vanity Fair about Lou Pearlman abusing other people in his care, though there’s the possibility of the Backstreet Boys being actually abused by him. As of late, it’s Lance Bass who admitted to being abused by him.

But it does make one wonder just how sexualised the Backstreet Boys actually were at their prime and why they got away with this for so long, since Carter was legally a child in some places when ‘Quit Playing Games With My Heart’ got played on telly. As the Backstreet Boys were first popular in some European countries, knowing that some of these countries have lower ages of consent, so this is partly why they got away with this. It would be more shocking if Pearlman actually filmed himself abusing all the Backstreet Boys, if not all of them then at least some of them, but this would confirm Jane Carter’s suspicions about him. Celestial even said that certain sex acts are demonic, aimed at debasing people to the point of bringing them real low. Or at least certain sex acts are ungodly, unbiblical and so on, whether if it’s something like sodomy or BDSM. And then given the Bible’s low regard for LGBT sex, there’s still the possibility that some sex acts are demonic and even masturbation would count in a way.

Actually even merely having sexual thoughts about something or somebody amounts to a kind of adultery, whether if the luster is in a relationship themself or not. This also goes for merely reading smut to the point of where when I prayed to God to help pastors help a certain cousin of mine stop reading porn herself, she ended up losing her husband along the way as I found out twice. Or I deliberately did the same thing and lost a classmate who was going to marry me, and then lose another who too was going to marry me a few years later due to my wickedness at the time. There’s still something strange about the Backstreet Boys is that they remained in the music industry longer than Ace of Base has (which has Christians in it, one of them sings in church these days), remained active in the charts longer than Hanson does (which also has Christians in it) yet prefer to have fans worship them instead of God. Admittedly the latter two aren’t any better, to the point of getting comeuppances eventually.

Even then the Backstreet Boys are kind of strange that since they remained in the public eye longer together, at any point where they could’ve used their platform to bring people to God, they’d rather have fans worship them like there’s no tomorrow to the point where all of them will turn out have fans for mistresses and then die by drowning. Even if Ace of Base and Hanson still aren’t any better, but it’s surreal to think that Zac Hanson is living out the desire Brian Littrell initially had before joining the Backstreet Boys in a way, or for another matter Jenny Berggren just the same. Not to mention Ace of Base has been defunct for years, thus giving Berggren ample time to devote herself to God for real, as much as she can and for most of the part. I guess it’s kind of unfortunate that the Backstreet Boys still not only remaining in the public eye together, but also continuining to have their new songs get radio airplay to this day, especially those that aren’t retreads of some songs before.

Especially if it’s keeping them from God where being out of the spotlight would’ve brought them closer to him as it is with both Hanson and Ace of Base, or for another matter Boyzone as it’s been defunct for years just the same. Backstreet Boys are in a really disadvantageous place where it’s clear they love the world more than they love God, that it’s going to be horrifying this Christmas when they all show up as demons to celebrate something like Krampusnacht when playing the song ‘Everybody’, which has blasphemous lyrics and it’s depressing why Brian Littrell never made his band stop playing this song, knowing it’ll grieve God a lot. But if bad company corrupts good character, then it clearly negatively affected his conduct a lot. Which is also the case with me, to the point where lately I’ve been revoking things that negatively influence me or will negatively influence me, however awkward and hard this is.

But it’s necessary to minimise this from happening over time, as well as trying not to get angry at others or hating them, even when I wanted to inflict harm on them (it’s my problem too). If it means minimising unwanted curse words in your head, it’s a hard decision at first, but necessary to keep rubbish from infiltrating your mind where it shouldn’t be. Or anything else that’ll pose a problem, which is just as awkward and painful. The journey isn’t over, but it would be necessary to let go of things that might pose problems later on. But it seems the Backstreet Boys would rather love the world, than the word of God, preferring to be at the centre of attention, instead of making God the centre instead. And the Backstreet Boys would rather have fans worship them, instead of making them worship God more. So they’ll be judged for this, bringing an end to what they’re doing.

Kissing bad influences goodbye

I realised in life that partly the reason why I keep on struggling with sin is that I’ve been around bad company for so long, that it’s going to take a while to undo their influence onto me. I’ve been around trolls, bitter people, perverts and all sorts of losers that make it harder for me to overcome sin in my life, lately I’ve been cutting them off to minimise their negative influence on me. Like if I have to stop being bitter, I have to stop being around bitter people myself. So on and so forth, that by cutting them off from my life, I will have to do something to undo their negative influence on me. Then comes the most difficult part: cutting off negative relatives in my life, because some of them are anti-Christian and pressure me to stop playing sermons and the like. I tried telling this to God before, though it kind of backfired.

Even then I feel like I need to cut off negative people in my life in one way or another, because they’re making it harder for me to not sin, some of them are anti-Christian themselves that it’s impacting me negatively and I need to get them out of my life. The Bible even said about having to hate one’s relatives, or at least cutting them off from your life to serve God more. Some media are anti-Christian, so cutting these off would help, however awkward it may be (I’d have to do it soon). It may not necessarily always involve swearing, blasphemy, hatred and the like that does the job, some of these may also condone other ills like adultery/infidelity in some way. As well as people condoning these ills themselves, I’ll be honest I used to follow somebody who enspouses these views. She’s also bitter and angry towards some people in her life.

Her attitude rubbed off on me and although I’ve stopped following her, it’s going to take awhile for her negative influence to subside in me. Or the others I’ve followed years before, that by not following them in any way, it would subside more quickly than expected. Maybe not but at least it would help lessen the load, along with God’s help. There’s another person who’s also like this in a way and has written porn herself, I used to follow her a lot but lately I don’t anymore. It’s also clear that she’s a bad influence to me just the same, so I stopped following and I’ve done the same with others. Getting rid of these people helps a lot in making me sin less, though it’s going to take some time for the influences to be undone. I wish I could unfollow somebody on Substack, who’s also not a good influence on me. I wish I could but merely not reading her blog helps in the meantime.

As you see she’s actually in an adulterous relationship herself, unapologetically reads porn herself, swears like mad, bitter towards Christianity and Christians, and sexualises herself a lot. The epitome of a woman who dresses like a prostitute and acts like one too, and if this is true then it does explain the likes of a number of popstars like Katy Perry, though this is more tragic because she was a Christian before. Katy Perry used to be a Christian singer, not particularly given to either provocative fashion or getting into affairs with other men before, if because she was single. And then she turned to the Devil, becoming the opposite of where she was when she started out in the music industry. Suffering from depression, bullying nuns, so on and so forth that it’s kind of Kafkasque at this point. A person who willingly stayed in the world, reaping the rotten fruits of this, getting worse over time.

So it’s better to not only learn from your mistakes, but let go of the things that are influencing you badly. It wouldn’t be immediate at first, but you’ll taste freedom eventually.

About the Stray Kids situation

Somebody going by the name of Nakita Wambui said that JY Park made Stray Kids with the intent of leading people astray, that he’s also a false teacher makes you wonder why he’d do these things. In the sense of moonlighting as a pastor to further deceive people with, especially given the stuff he condones and does is the opposite of it. It’s one thing to struggle with sin, since this is frequently my case. But it’s another to be rather unapologetic in being evil, as it is with JY Park that no sooner or later his company will close abruptly. If he tries to rebuild it in any way he feels like doing it at all, he’ll lose his daughters in a row (I’ve rebelled against God and lost so many dogs as a result). His company might experience financial problems soon this year, starting this month at any point this week.

Stray Kids might become less popular with the public due to scandals regarding the band members’ behaviour and the possible abuse of them at the hands of their manager, that makes the sexualisation of them seem much more obvious. Actually that’s not even unique to the Stray Kids themselves as it’s also the case with other bands like Mirotic and the like, there’s a video by Mirotic that garnered controversy over something that seemed sexual. But it’s surprising why the Backstreet Boys didn’t catch flack for something like ‘Quit Playing Games With My Heart’ despite the fact that Nick Carter was legally a child at the time (at least in some places) when this got released, add to that his own mum alleges that Lou Pearlman did something inappropriate to him.

Add to that there might be sex tapes involving the Backstreet Boys themselves done to humiliate them and even if Lou Pearlman didn’t outright molest Nick Carter at the time, he still would’ve been inappropriate to him in another way like showing him porn to keep him entertained. Singer Kaya said that Nick watched porn when she was with him, so there’s a chance that he got that habit of watching porn from merely being around Lou Pearlman. Lou Pearlman might not have molested Nick himself, but he was still inappropriate to him by exposing him to sexualised media, at to negatively influence him later on in life. No wonder why Nick Carter ended up the way he is towards certain women, Lou Pearlman was definitely a bad influence to him and resident Christian Brian Littrell never bothered rebuking him at any point he did that.

Bad company corrupts good heart, Littrell wanted to serve in ministry but unfortunately became so worldly that it’s depressing why he never makes his fans worship God, instead of having them worship him and his band at the cruises they offer. Zac Hanson got off better because God rebuked him to stop being proud or something, so he let a mishap happen to him so that he can go back to him. He’s currently a church deacon, doing the thing Littrell wanted to do in a way. Nakita said many times that K-Pop is very worldly, far worldlier than one would realise. It’s not that you have K-Pop members alluding to the Devil and hell from time to time, it’s not just that they’re very sexualised and also want to be worshipped as idols, but that the K-Pop industry’s also built on perishable goods instead of permanent spiritual treasures.

Although not all K-Pop fans are this materialistic, especially if they’re cash-strapped, but it seems K-Pop agencies often pressure them into buying things they can’t always afford, let alone have the time to buy those when they have other things to do (the whole God and mammon thing, I learnt this the hard way before). It’s not enough to merely have books about K-Pop singers, it’s not enough to merely stream K-Pop songs and live broadcasts of K-Pop musicians and brands, though this isn’t unique to them as western musicians and bands like the Spice Girls and Kiss also do similar things. It’s kind of telling that one of the Kiss members calls himself ‘The Demon’, guess which god does he serve? It’s not our Father in Heaven, hallowed be his name. Admittedly I prayed to the Devil before and lost two dogs along the way.

Or did the same again but got a cat sick and so on. I said before that it’s better to do a Zac Hanson by committing social suicide by mistake (or happenstance, since God knew he was drifting away from him at the time Hansongate happened) to return to his first love, the Lord, by serving in church these days than to do a Brian Littrell and get so lost in the world that he’s effectively of it at this point. There are K-Pop idols who do want to serve God themselves that once their agencies go bankrupt, they’ll truly be free from this bondage. I admit to being in bondage to sin, likely because I tend to rely on my strength a lot, in things like holding grudges and being resentful, despite not wanting to give into them these days. I still wish I could master them, even when I don’t make bitter posts these days.

At this point, I’ve cut off some people who are negative influences to me, but there’s still a lot of work to do as their influence has been years deep in me. Letting go of them is the only way to go free, even when the journey isn’t over yet. Maybe this is true for these K-Pop idols and even their own fans, once these agencies go into administration they’ll be free even if the journey isn’t over yet.

Locking out others

When it comes to K-Pop and consumerism, I feel the way K-Pop agencies target fans is really predatory. In the sense of offering really redundant collectibles like one photocard per copy of a certain album that offering photobooks would be a more cost-effective alternative instead, maybe these already do exist and some K-Pop companies aren’t in the habit of offering one photocard per album copy. But I feel this kind of consumerism would have the effect of locking out other K-Pop fans from actually enjoying their favourite bands and musicians in any way they wish to (support), where giving up on K-Pop altogether would be far less draining on their wallets and perhaps time, if they have to worship God, do homework or help out others they actually know themselves.

There is a way to show one’s love for musicians without breaking the bank real badly, even if this means resorting to pirated copies when official copies aren’t readily available elsewhere. Even if this means being content with finding transcribed and scanned articles pertaining to them, merely streaming concert broadcasts and songs, being in online social groups about them, and watching archived performances on social media. I’ve done this before to bands like The Prodigy, Ace of Base and Massive Attack, I’ve been unemployed and now underemployed, so I feel the ways K-Pop agencies make their fans get more of something makes it harder for other K-Pop fans to truly dedicate themselves to such a lifestyle that perhaps certain alternatives would have to take their place instead, especially if their budget’s at the mercy of somebody else’s as it is with me.

No doubt idolatry is bad and it’s kind of telling with K-Pop, but the problem will be the same if somebody replaced both BTS and Stray Kids with INXS and Stray Cats, which is already the case with other people before. I’ve fallen into this trap before, sometimes even if my intentions were well-meaning at the time, so it kind of hurts falling into this a couple of times before myself. But I feel the way K-Pop agencies force their fans to find financially insensible ways of supporting their favourite musicians isn’t good, not just because it would eat up the time needed to worship God and spend more time in the real world, but also because it’s not good if it starts eating up the budget needed for necessitites like food that sometimes K-Pop fans would have to chose one or the other as it is with me before but with other things as I found out later on (to the point of missing something I truly want, it hurts).

One could love a K-Pop musician and not be too materialistic, but K-Pop agencies’ habit of having to plaster their employees’ likenesses onto merchandise, even those other K-Pop fans can’t easily afford is too much. To be fair if witnessing the likenesses of the Stray Kids on foodstuffs like Pepero is weird, I had a schoolmate who collected lollipops featuring Spice Girls (her other favourite is Nickelback), so similar merchandising existed before for western pop bands and musicians. There were books about these groups before, especially for fans who want to learn more about them. And it’s still a thing to this day, so in a sense it’s not unique to K-Pop. But even then predatory music labels, musicians, bands and agencies will always be a thing, especially when it comes to exploiting fan admiration in really unethical and questionable ways. Mind you, the Backstreet Boys were part of a Ponzi scheme before.

And then they’d offer cruises for fans to join them, with somebody alleging that one Backstreet Boy would have affairs with his fans, so it’s really exploitative made worse by that another one’s a Christian. It’s weird why he never held him accountable for this, since the Bible also instructs people to kindly rebuke others of their wrongdoing. Or Nick Carter’s for another matter, since he also flirts with fans and has been the target of rape allegations. Even then there’s something wrong about people in the music industry doing a lot to exploit fannish affections for them to the point of taking advantage of them sexually, which is the real reason why we have groupies to begin with. Musicians will do anything to exploit fangirl affection for them, going so far to turn them into their playthings and worse if they have wives themselves (David Bowie, AJ McLean, possibly all the other four if they too turn out have made mistresses out of their fans), that a power imbalance is going to be painfully inevitable.

So this is likely why K-Pop agencies are so predatory towards financially strapped K-Pop fans, it’s a power imbalance that they enjoy where they get a lot of money, but the fans are left with little else to spend on what’s truly necessary for themselves and their families and friends. They are greedy and love money to the point of being evil, though this isn’t unique to K-Pop itself as those in the western music industry do similar things themselves. It would be wiser to pull a Zac Hanson this time around, in the sense of committing social suicide by accidentally to be closer to God, than to pull a Brian Littrell and commit spiritual suicide by deliberately exploiting fans a lot. If sin keeps people away from God, then the way these musicians enable idolatry make it harder to overcome for long and often as it is with me before.

Even if it were possible to pray for musicians as I’ve done before, there are those who cynically exploit fans to satisfy their egos and greed with, to the point where they never truly loved their fans enough to be concerned for their budgets upon knowing others can’t afford to visit them in concerts and cruises and so on. Other cynically exploit fans for sexual gratification, if some members of the Backstreet Boys are any indication, though it would be horrifying if all members did this. But it still proves the point how some people in the music industry are so predatory to fans, whether if they’re into K-Pop or another, as to cynically exploit them left or right, just ask how this Kiss fan feels about Kiss. Even then it still goes to show you that this isn’t unique to K-Pop bands themselves, since their western counterparts are similarly guilty of this.

Take Me Out Of The Dark

As far as I can recall, I was in a dark house with my relatives, then having sexual thoughts about a cartoon character, before being in a really dark room where Satan appeared and then God showed up, dragging me away from him and taking me to a well-lit church with faces I know from watching church sermons, it was even next to this room suggesting that God is taking me out of bondage and darkness and into the light. I’ve struggled long and hard enough with darkness in my soul that it’s about time to truly be in the light as this year draws into a close, that I have kind of stagnated in my spiritual growth at times suggest that this dream is about God taking me into the light for good. The darkness may still be in me, but it shouldn’t be for long to the point where the light has to come and it’s going to get me to worship God again, thus having to stay away from darkness for good.

I guess it’s a kind of prophetic dream where I might be in a situation where I wouldn’t (have to) live in darkness for long, I’ve struggled with fighting sin on my own that it’s about time to not only rely more on God, but to step into the light and actually mature or progress even further than that. As of now, I’ve been doing a lot to stay away from people that make it harder for me to fight certain sins like blasphemy, swearing and bitterness, even if my attempts don’t always go as expected. But that dream made me realise I wouldn’t have to be in darkness, I can be in the light and truly worship God, even if the road to sanctification is still ongoing. But in a way the darkness in me doesn’t have to define me, I’m probably in a season where I might be leaving darkness for good, if this dream is any indication. It may be the start of this season, but for as long as I keep going, the darkness doesn’t have to define me for long.

The fact that I could feel that Jesus or God is dragging me away from the Devil in my sleep suggests that my fight with darkness might be ending sooner than expected, or at least it’s beginning to run its course if I continue with the fight against evil whenever it arises in me at all. Maybe that’s what this dream is all about and why I shouldn’t grow weary in doing good, because it might be beginning to be paid off and my prayers about wanting to stop sinning might be getting answered. Maybe not immediately but at least it’s starting to happen sooner than expected, even if the road to perfection’s still a long way from now and by the time I’ve truly stopped sinning is when I die. But with me being taken to a well-lit church suggests a burning desire to worship God and my dark season might be over sooner than expected, at least for as long as I willingly keep up with it then I could get something good in due season.

I might be changing for the better for as long as I keep up with it, but the dream indicates I might be closer to this goal than I realise, maybe not immediately but closer than I expected if I continue doing right by God so.

Don’t hang out with them

The Bible pretty much talked about peer contagion before, when it comes to the verse of bad company corrupting good character, that the sort of people you hang out with will influence you for the worst. Like I used to have a habit of going to trolling websites, going so far to troll people and I used to bully a classmate before because I saw somebody else doing it to them, before getting bullied by myself (golden rule much). My cousin also got into the habit of bullying people because she hung out with bullies herself, despite getting bullied and possibly admitting to getting whipped or spanked a lot for being a pervert in the future. It can also work in the reverse, in a more positive direction, where if you want to be a good person then hang out with good people. Even the Bible says this about having other people support you and also in kind.

I think being in the wrong company makes it harder to overcome certain sins or any sin really, like if you hang out long with unsaved people who aren’t supportive of your faith, then your faith will weaken as what somebody else pointed out to me (I also tend to rely on my own strength, so). It’s like this with one of the members of the Newsboys group, a Christian band by the way, because although he wanted to be a good Christian the only problem is his own bands (Newsboys and DC Talk) often hung out with their more secular peers, thus making it harder for him to overcome certain sins he wants to stop and the lack of a road pastor to keep him in check would worsen matters for him. Whilst it is wrong to blame others but being around people who pressure you to stop being a Christian and then you give into them kind of weakens my faith in God.

I feel like that with these other relatives of them, they get really violent to me if I do something Christian, though sometimes it’s my own undoing that got me here and there. But even then it’s hard being a good Christian when everybody else around you aren’t just really secular, but actively discourages you from being a good Christian yourself, that you might as well be better off without them. If this means actively cutting them off from your life, as to avoid giving into their demands to weaken your faith in God, then it’s a much needed necessity because they are not only making your struggles worse, but also hinder your growth in any way. Like they don’t want me to listen to sermons, read Bible readings and so on, that they’d rather have me remain secular than to become a better Christian over time. One of them even succcessfully undermined one of my younge sisters’ faith in God.

This was because she used run away from family members because she thought they were going to rape her, only to have him suceed in keeping her from going to church and at any time where she could’ve stayed there longer to grow further, she either stagnated or backslided (I did backslide before and the journey back to God is long and tough at this point). She does read her Bible, listen to Christian music and stuff, but it’s also partly my fault for ruining her faith in God, preventing her from listening to sermons but because I didn’t like somebody else at the time. So it’s my fault why she backslided, to the point where she doesn’t listen to sermons anymore. There have been occasions where I did pray for her to return to God, though I might as well need to be more frequent in praying for her given my issues with her at times.

As of now, I’ve stopped visiting certain bloggers because they make my battle with blasphemy harder to win, given they blaspheme and curse. Admittedly it would be tough getting rid of other things and people, coupled with delayed obedience still being disobedience in a way, that my battle with certain sins is harder than it should be. But I’m not certain if I could even have the guts to do it, because there’s this part of me that feels oddly sympathetic to these people in some way. Oddly obsessed with others in another way, that it would be better to pray for both of them instead. And it’s also hard to leave family members who keep you from God when you’re not that financially independent, that makes it harder to avoid their influence at any point in time to the point where being solitary helps. Even the Bible speaks of this highly at times, though it also understands the need or desire for companionship.

The Bible does speak of people being finally freed of their captors, so in a way it offers hope to those wanting to avoid bad people in their lives, even if it’s their fault why they got there like with Babylon to Judah. So there’s hope for people who want to avoid bad influences in their lives, even if this means having to cut them off from your life, because they’re not helping you at all in your spiritual walk. Maybe this too will come for the singer from Newsboys, but this means actively avoiding secular music venues when possible or likely. And why the world is so corrupting to people.