Mouse on the mat

There was a mouse on the mat that either the cat or the dog got it until Nana told my brother to get rid of it by putting away the mat and my sister put tissue on the corpse. One of my dogs got a baby mouse, one of our cats eats rats and mice which Nana said that Naning should be hunting mice more often like the cat does instead of merely playing with it.

Nana also said that she talks to the dogs to keep her from forgetting and developing a disease, she said that she’s pleased that I do talk to her from time to time. I also want to go to Cubao and stay there for a few more days as I haven’t been there in a long time since September, which’s where I last went to and stayed in there.

Nana said that I shouldn’t put banana and mango peelings outside, going so far to say that I should’ve thrown them in the rubbish bin or something so she’s putting away the peelings and putting them somewhere else instead.

I went out

I went out yesterday to buy food with my sister and then we went back home where she talked about earwax to my father, I have nothing else to say but Nana told me not to be choosy with food, I should eat wet food in addition to dry food that she says Lola’s telling her that I shouldn’t be choosy with food.

It’s going to be Halloween and my brother’s birthday, I played a game before but I also want to go to Cubao and hang out with my grandmother there. I haven’t been to Cubao in a long time since around July and the last time I went there was in September when she was cutting out lace as I was sewing it onto a blouse I made.

I still want to go out of Marikina and earn more money from either dressmaking or healthcare.

If it’s not cultural appropriation, then it’s…

In the sense of how cultures are appropriated by others without much consent and care (as far as I get it) but I suspect that if it’s not cultural appropriation it’s probably going to be muse syndrome in the sense of how one culture and ethnicity are often the inspiration for another, sometimes unreciprocated and disproportionate. This is as if Guerilla Girls pointed out that while women often served as the inspiration for male artists, there aren’t a lot of female artists to even things out.

So to speak, it’s parsimonious to say that black musicians and especially black blues musicians are the muses of white rockers but there aren’t a lot of black rockers around, let alone anybody else other than Slash and Jimi Hendrix (the only black rockers that I can think of) that makes it disproportionate in a sense. It’s not that black guitarists and black rockers are entirely unknown and forgotten.

So far the black rock bands I can think of are Death (sometimes considered to be one of the earliest punk bands around), Wrust and Junior Marvin Hanson band, there might be many more black guitarists that do equal their white counterparts in guitar-playing. There might be black rockers out there waiting to be discovered, black rockers did dominate rock music at one point or another.

But that does make one wonder how and why black rockers, whilst not entirely underrepresented, seem to be very much overshadowed by their white counterparts or perhaps more grimly speaking, almost outnumbered by their white counterparts as the years go by to the point where black music inevitably serves as the inspiration for white musicians, the more disproportionate it gets.


When I went out shopping with my sister, I saw a purple-haired woman with yogurt in one of her hands and my sister said this to my father. I don’t blog as much as I did before, but I might need other things to do for now. Anyways, that shopping experience fascinated me since I saw that purple-haired woman who made me want to dye my hair as well.


I went out shopping with my brother, though sometimes I shop with one of my sisters for food. It’s not a remarkable day that we shop together, but I did buy myself some chocolate snacks to munch on. We also bought his Choc Nut, bread (as we ran out of it) and soy milk which me and my sister drank (she washed Sandra the dog before).

I still want to go out to Cubao not just to sell stuff there (because I need to earn more money this way) but also practise by using a sewing machine to sew shorts with. My sister told me that I should’ve bought a sewing machine, which costs only 300 pesos instead of buying comic books and hoarding more books.

That’s what my sister said, I hoard books and I stopped buying books because of that.

My sister

My sister would tell me to take studies seriously and that many schools are closed due to coronavirus but I feel like I want to go to school and then get a job. I want to go to a vocational school and then get a job, so that I’ll have something to earn and to learn from it.

She told me to improve on my sewing skills, as well as her not liking me and why she’s often mad at me for the little things that I do. I tried my hardest to please her, but she does have a habit of scolding me a lot where she says that I often test people’s patience and stuff.

She says that I hoard books, books that I don’t even read and I should’ve gotten a sewing machine which costs 300 pesos. She even said that I should be better off practising on my sewing skills first because I’ll get a leg up when I do take up dressmaking in school.

But she also said that schools are closed, that makes me feel depressed because I really want to go there myself. She said that it’s unrealistic of me to go there since the college she goes to is also closed, but I still want to go to school one day to learn dressmaking there.

I don’t feel comfortable at home, I try my hardest to learn as she says that I don’t take learning seriously but I feel confused and not very well-supported by the people around me that I want to leave home. (I am going to leave home due to Lola having a working sewing machine in her house.)


Nana said that I shouldn’t eat while walking and that I should get all the carrots instead of returning while walking and vice versa that I tried my hardest to stay still while eating and eating all the carrots I can. She also said about the sunflowers in UP where my aunt was photographed with them.

Nana also said on the phone about the pink and white flowers, she said about me eating pieces of carrots and that my sewing kit box doubles as the container for the money I’ve earned in the course of a few months. She didn’t say that on the phone, but she enjoys talking to my aunt on the phone.

(Sinabi ni Nana ayoko yung itlog.)

Nana said that she cooked pancake using the flour Lola gave to us, she also said about somebody getting a kettle and Nova being one of the former maids in Cubao. She said that Nova was one of my aunt’s former maids, she’s stated to be happy according to her.

Nana said that while she was in Cubao with the other maids, she ate 2 pandesals and egg with them. She also said that I sold comic scripts to my aunt for 100 pesos.

My Nana

My Nana said that Lola blames her for not teaching us properly, she said that it’s Lola who should be doing the teaching to us and she told me to crush garlic the right way by putting it in the centre and a quick crush at that without the constant mild crushing.

My Nana would talk to Aunt Crisma on the phone for nearly an hour, talking about things like the Sapigao family, cats and Lola again. I would try to listen to her talking to Aunt Crisma on the phone, trying to transcribe what she’s been saying to me. She’s talking about things like being a helper and men.

Nana said that in the church, there are Aunt Crisma’s helpers who gave them food, where Lola’s going to Asingan where Lola wants to stay in the old house but there aren’t any people helping her out. She also said that her knees are weak from not walking a lot, she’s telling the dogs to exercise outside.

Nana also said that Lola’s starting to forget more often due to a disease called Alzheimer, my aunt confirmed and said the same thing. (I remember how Lola thought that the fabric went missing only to give me it on a certain Sunday, I think.)

What my Nana said

She said that whenever animals like cats and dogs get sick, they eat grass and she said that Naning ate the wrong kind of grass. Her favourite cat, the late Pepper, had a habit of eating flowers. She also said that the horse, carabao, cow and goat are strong from eating a lot of grass, that Naning went around in the terrace looking for that clover leaf to eat. Nana got it from the dog, I think, and put it in this house.

Nana said

Nana said that I should wait or maghintay ako, she also said that I should’ve allowed the water to boil before putting the noodles there so it’ll be faster. When I was interviewing her, she said that she used to do Judas face up, Jericho down in school where she learnt military drills and theology from a French teacher like the Eight Beatitudes.

She said that she had a dog named Bantay and a cat named Muning, which I wrote it down in a series of essays I wrote sometime before which I self-published. She also said that I’m sometimes like a kid, especially whenever I eat bread whilst standing up or walking around and getting what I wanted which’s why she said that I should’ve been the youngest.