The Illustrated naval and military magazine: A monthly journal …
1885 – Read – More editions
If we only had an old maiden aunt,” she presently went on, ” or an old bachelor uncle, who could come and live here and … There’s Clara Holt has such a delicious old aunt, with a front, and goggles, and a reticule on her arm, and a poodle that …
Two Maiden Aunts
Mary H. Debenham – 2017 – No preview – More editions
CHAPTER I THE AUNTS ‘Child, be mother to this child.
The English Illustrated Magazine – Page 251
1897 – Read – More editions
About that time a poet on the Buttes had a death in his family : it was that of a maiden aunt whom he had never seen … from a Parisian point of view he was acknowledged, and he himself was conscious of it, the prettiest poodle of the quarter.
Ballou’s Monthly Magazine – Volume 48 – Page 179
1878 – Read – More editions
“You see, I was living at Auburn then, and having a rich maiden aunt residing at Rochester I kept up a desuliory correspondence with her, sent her rare cats, poodles, canaries, and parrots, by the gross. Anl’, apropos of parrots, did you ever …
The Scots Magazine … – Volumes 95-96 – Page 291
1825 – Read – More editions
… spouse, or an old maiden-aunt with a meat little estate: only beslobber her hand well with kisses, and success will crown your wishes. But we … As to the dog scene—how shall we Your master’s a noodle Scarce fit to hold Selanie’s spoon.
Saturday Mornings – Page 2
Peggy Webb – 1990 – Snippet view
She’d been taught family loyalty, and family loyalty meant taking care of homeless maiden aunts, especially one who had … “Poodles are a nervous breed. Aunt Bertha. Christine will settle down in time.” Aunt Bertha was at the foot of the stairs …
My Aunt’s Ant’s Aunt
Claire Loach – 2018 – Preview – More editions
It has wonderful flow, humour and poetry, and teaches about compassion and respect for others. As a bonus, there is also a video of the story being read and sung by the author that can be seen on youtube (claireloach).
Museum of Foreign Literature and Science – Volume 8 – Page 421
1826 – Snippet view – More editions
MY AUNT’S POODLE. My Aunt Margaret has a poodle. … Priscilla Thwaites (a maiden lady of fifty-seven) being merely first cousins to her late husband. e assertion that all the members of my Aunt Margaret’s family were invited to dine with her, …
The Museum of Foreign Literature, Science and Art
1826 – Snippet view – More editions
My Aunt Margaret has a poodle. … Had I any faith in transmigration, I should say that the soul of Bill Soames had passed into the ugly body of my old aunt’s poodle. … (a maiden lady of fifty-seven) being merely first cousins to her late husband.
An Anthology of Winning Works: The 1980s one-act play – Page 277
Carlos Palanca Memorial Awards – 2000 – Snippet view
(He sits on the edge of the bed, picks up poodle from the floor, cradles it on his lap, opens carton of dog food and starts feeding poodle.) Come on, Mimi, you must be … giving her as a present for my maiden aunt in Bacolod. Come on, Mimi, fill …
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Ballou’s Monthly Magazine, Volume 48
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Terms of Service
178 – 182
whom you adore, is safe under the sod,” insolently.
“You are right, Mr. Alstyne, — [do love my husband with my whole heart,” she replied in a low tone, her face deadly pale.
“Satan and furies!” he exclaimed hoarsely. “His blood shall pay for this, my beauty; for I swear I will not be balked. I suppose you have done me the honor to listen to my conversation, Mr. Cameron,” with elaborate politeness, as I appeared on the scene. “As you are obliged to leave the world so soon, 1 am happy to aid you,” he sneered, deliberately raising his revolver.
There was a wild shriek, a flash and report, and all was dark about me.
The next I knew I was on the beach, and my wife’s arms were about my neck, her warm kisses on my lips, and her dear voice murmuring in my ear,—
“I love you! I love you.”
”Thank God!” I gasped fervently, and fell back in a faint.
I was dangerously ill after this with a fever and a broken arm, and Pearl nearly killed herself in caring for me.
Alstyne’s excitement had prevented his taking correct aim; and the result was, only a broken arm and a bath in the sea.
Shrieking for help, Pearl sprang into the water after me, and succeeded in keeping my head above the water until aid arrived; so, after all, I owed my life to my darling’s love and courage.
During my happy convalescence, Pearl shyly confessed that she began to love me before we left home, and, seeing the contrast between Jack’s conduct and mine, soon gave me her whole heart in undivided . love.
“And, O Theo, dearest!” she added softly, her ‘eyes ashine, “you must get well: I cannot give you up.”
Jack fled to Europe, staying several years. He married, at last, a stolid German, ugly, old, and very large, who was reported an heiress. When too late, he found that a small annuity was all she had. He is no longer the handsome and fascinating flirt, proud of his elegant figure and magnetic eyes. His eyes are bleared, and his fine features look coarse and sensual.
Although many years have passed since then, our love has known no cloud, and I reverently thank my heavenly Father daily for giving me my darling.
BRITISH GOVERNMENTAL SALARIES.
In the Blue-book of Great Britain for the current year, just published, is given the annual allowance paid to the queen and each of the members of the royal family. Her majesty (including, of course, the civil list, salaries and expenses of the royal household, &c.) received £406,709 19s. 6d., the Prince of Wales £40,000, the Duke of Edinburgh £25,000, the Duke of Connaught and Prince Leopold each £15,000, the Princess of Wales £10,000, the Duke of Cambridge £12,000, the Crown Princess of Prussia £8000, the Princess Alice, Princess Helena, Princess Louise, and the Duchess of Cambridge each £6000, the Princess Mary of Teck £5000, the Princess Augusta, Duchess of MecklenburgStrelitz, £3000. Turning to the diplomatic pensions we find that Lord Stratford de RedcliSe enjoys an allowance
of £1786, Lord Cowley and Lord Napier each £1700, Sir Geo. Hamilton Seymour and Sir James Hudson each £1300, while eight or ten other gentlemen are rewarded at about half that figure. The chief pensioners for tht ir own services are the following: Lord Cliaucellors, each at £5000, — Lord Chelmsford, Lord Haihedey, and Lord Selborne; Sir Win. Earle £3750, and Sir Samuel Martin, Sir John Byles, Sir Henry Keating, Lord Penzance and Sir Richard Kindersley each figure at £3500. Lord Eversley, as exSpeaker of the House of Commons, is down for a pension of £4000; while three exCibinet Ministers, Sir George Grey, Mr. Spencer Walpole and Mr. Thomas Miluer Gibson, have each £2000. The Lord Chancellor receives £10,000.
LOVE AND GHERKINS.
BY’ FREDERICK H. DEWEY.
“I never told you, did I, Charley,” inquired my friend, Major Tresbottle, one hot afternoon, as we lolled over the bar at Cartwells, individually occupied in discussing a cobbler and julep, and languidly watching the street-sprinkler keeping the uneven tenor of its way up and down the street, — “no, 1 am sure I never told you how a pickle saved me from matrimony.”
”Saved you from matrimonyF’ I exclaimed. ”Debarred, you mean.”
“Either, or both, as you please,” responded the major, with a nonchalance I never could hope of attaining. “It is all past ions} ago. — thirty or forty years behind,— a thing of the past. But it is never forgotten. The remembrance of that ridiculous scrape makes me blush even now, at sixand-forty, and I used to curse that pickle once a week on a fair average; but now, as l glide along the placid current of middlelife. I look back upon the occurrence witli calm regret. —nothing more.”
“And have you had more than one love affair, then, major?”
“I have had several,” replied that ex-official calmly.
“Let’s have it, major.”
“Dry wheels don’t run smoothly, Charley.” suggested the major, with a glance at bis empty glass.
I motioned to the mustached gentleman who stood behind the massive bar resplendent in the snowiest of shirts, most extensive of pins, and daintiest of studs, and said, with deferential meekness,—
“A couple of cobblers, if you please, sir.”
Thanks to the dexterity of the fashionable gentleman at Cartwell’s, — a suave dexterity I have never seen surpassed,—the desired draughts were ready in a trice, and ‘shortly embellished the bar; and, taking his flass daintily between his thumb and forefinger, the major began thus: —
“Have you ever been in Rochester, Charley.— Rochester, the beautiful, the ugly, the hot and cold, the gay and stupid; where the girls are unsurpassed for beauty and homeliness, and the young men for spending thousands and hoarding dimes? I say,
Charley, have you ever been in Rochester?” “I have not.”
“Then you don’t know old Magnum, of East Avenue, who owns half the town?”
“Have n’t that exquisite delight.”
“Nor the Misses Magnum, Emily, Eunice, and Alice, — the latter especially? Then let me tell you that you have yet to see the three graces, beauty, wit, and money. Ah! there are attractions for you. But I forget; that was years ago. They are old and ugly now.”
“Tell me all about it. major. — Sir, will you give us a couple of cigars?”
The fashionable gentleman previously mentioned slung the box adown the bar with a precise velocity only acquired by long and cautious practice. After we had helped ourselves, the major resumed,—
“This was before 1 thought of going to West Point, Charley, and it changed the whole course of my life. Had it not been for a mere pickle, a cursed inch-and-a-half cucumber, soaked in brine and vinegar, I would now be a staid, rich old merchant instead of being an ex-follower of the glorious profession of anus. But. as my friend Charley says several times in the course of a six-column story in the Minevah Sunday Courier, let us not anticipate.
“You see, I was living at Auburn then, and having a rich maiden aunt residing at Rochester I kept up a desuliory correspondence with her, sent her rare cats, poodles, canaries, and parrots, by the gross. Anl’, apropos of parrots, did you ever hear the story of the German student and his parrot?”
“We will come to that in due time, without doubt, major,” I said. “Now let us have your pickle story. I regret that at that early age you were so mercenary as to send presents to a rich maiden aunt.”
“I came into her snug property about ten years ago,” said the major, with calm complacence. “But to my story.
”You see. as I was a versatile, cosmopolitan little fellow then of sixteen or seventeen, I picked up an extensive acquaintance among the young fellows, and soon had the run of Rochester society,—and there is none better in the United States. With an especial aptness at keeping a sharp eye on the qui vive for number one, I soon became on terms of close intimacy with the Magnum family, and particularly so with the lovely Alice, whose flashing black eyes, pearly teeth, and general beauty, together with her father’s bank account, soon brought me to her feet as an acknowledged suitor.”
” At sixteen!” I cried. “Major, you qjd
“There is nothing hke getting your hand in at an early age,” said the major. “Besides, I had a tolerble mustache even then, and passed with every one for twenty, at least. Every one was well aware that I had great expectations regarding my aunt’s property, which was second to none excepting that of Magnum; and that old fox saw my suit, winked at it, gave me one of his Havanas now and then, and went to visit my aunt.
“Well, Charley, I walked, talked, danced, sighed, rode, and cooed with the beautiful Alice, who was by no means averse to my attentions. I kept her supplied with sentimental novels from New York, and petted her confounded blue cat, — a most irascible feline, who scratched’ me once a day on a fair average. Everything went on swimmingly, and my ring was on the point of encircling Alice’s taper finger, when a confoundedly good-looking cousin of hers came home from a German University, and immediately became my rival.
“Winslow Cuwier (that was his name), by some diabolical mischance, happened to be immensely rich; and rich in his own right> into the bargain. He had his money shrewdly invested, whereas mine was only prospective; and before he had been at Magnum’s a week old Magnum had given me the cold shoulder, and was hand and glove with dashing Winslow Currier.
“The whole family, with the exception of Alice, seemed crazy after Beau Winslow. Paterfamilias gave up his morning paper to him, and insinuated that a very good thing might be done with a little ready cash in this direction or that, and kindly offered to show him how to double his money in stocks; mater familias insisted on his making her house his home, — would not hear of his going to a hotel, — and assigned him
the best chambers in the house; while the girls — why, they worked him a drawer full of slippers, embroidered countless handkerchiefs for him, petted and wheedled him; and Alice — well, 1 did n’t overlike their stolen glances and covert promenades any better than I liked their continual propinquity. But I now called oftener than ever, and though having the exquisite pleasure of seeing that I had lost my prestige, and was rather tolerated than welcomed, my motto was, ‘never give up the ship, and old Magnum’s money-bags;’ and, by doin^ my level best, held my own, and no more.
“It was neck and neck wiih Currier and me, — I soon saw that,—and, not a little anxious as werl as curious to see how the affair would turn out, I applied myself with redoubled assiduity to maintain the ground I had now; in plainer parlance, to secure Alice, who, was plainly in a state of vacillation, rather inclining toward Currier and the greater wealth.”
Here the major paused to pull at his cobbler, and, having moistened his throat, he continued.
“Well, Charley, things were in this charming state when one evening I found myself sitting down to an elegant tea-table with the family, Beau Currier included, of course. By some chance, — I always thought the old woman (excuse my warm language) had something to do with it, — Alice was placed between Currier and me; and as neither of us had either of the other girls at our elbows we of course devoted ourselves to her.
”From the moment of sitting down I began to exert all my powers of fascination in a hot race with Currier, who kept up a running stream of small-talk on the other side, to which Alice paid an attentive ear, giving me only an odd moment’s notice now and then. As for the family, why, damn me, it was ‘ Winslow’ this, and ‘ Winslow’ that; and ‘What do you think of “Faust,” Wuislow?’ and ‘Is n’t Nilsson charming?’ and ‘O Winslow! you ‘II take me down the Bay Road in my new phaeton, Saturday, won’t you, Winslow?’ and ‘Currier, how about that “Central” stock? are you going to invest, eh? You’d better. Excellent chance there,—one .in ten thousand. I’m going in.’ And ‘Winslow, does your tea suit?’ and ‘ You had better let me order a new set for your chamber.’ Egad! young Tresbottle stood no chance at all, ignored as he was by the whole table, with the family against hint.
”Well, Charley, I put on a bold front, and determined to face the music, and never say die; hut I was at last completely filenced, and for ten minutes did n’t speak a word. Meanwhile Currier was doing great execution, with the whole family in hue a;.d civ. At last muter famiUas spoke suddenly. —
”’Winslow, we are going out.to Cousin Fmnk’s country-house next week, —a lovely place. Won’t you join us?’
“‘ With all my heart,’ said Currier.
“Heretofore I had always received a similar invitation, and of course expected one now; but, to my overwhelming astonishment, none came. I looked from one to another in surprise, and fancied I detected a triumphant smile flickering about Mrs. Magnum’s merciless lips.
“For me, Charley, that was almost a settler. Nothing now but a superhuman effort could restore to me the prestige so ignobly lost. I was snubbed; outrageously snubbed. My heart beat like a trip-hammer, and the blood of mortification rushed to my face. For a moment or two all was silence. All stared at their tea-cups, and laughed in their sleeves at poor me. Alice reddened, and studiously analyzed the pattern of the carpet. I felt like sinking through the floor, or rushmg from the house; but by a superhuman effort at self-control I kept my seat.
“Just then the servant brought in a small dish of gherkins, — the very little fellows, you know. They were passed, but no one took. I was so emharrassed I scarcely knew what I was doing, when I took one, and commenced to cut it ferociously.
“You know these little silver tea-knives, Charley, — little, dull, detestable things, fit for nothing, much less for cutting! Under ordinary circumstances I would not have attempted to cut with one of them, — for I knew better; but, hot and furious, I drove my fork into the gherkin, and hacked away with my knife.
“Confound these little tea-knives! will lhey never be discarded? They hang on like bad sixpences. The knifei. never made for cutting, slipped, of course, and presto! away went my sauce — I believe it was blackberry — into Alice’s lap, all over her costly white dress, while the gherkin flew like a flash of lightning across the table into iiasnum’s eye!
“‘ Mercy!’ cried Alice, starting to her feet with a scream. ‘Confounded awkward!’ roared Magnum, stamping about the room with his eye full of salt vinegar. ‘O Heaven! my eye! inyeye” ‘Well, did you ever!’ said Miss Eunice, with a glance of scorn at poor me. ‘Well, I never!’chimed Emily, turning up her delicate nose. Currier sneered, and assisted Alice, who gave me a look of undisguised abhorrence. Mrs. Magnum rolled her eyes, and clasped her hands. The servants coughed, and vainly «ndeavored to look unconscious,—fifty times more polite than their betters.
“I blushed and tingled for a moment, then, feeling as if I had committed the most atrocious crime in the calendar, rose to my feet.
“‘I beg — beg — implore your forgiveness, Alice’ —
“‘Miss Magnum, if you please,’ said Alice, bowing icily.
‘”lt was entirely an accident, I assure you ” —
“‘ Oh, we know’t was an accident, young Tresbottle,’ interrupted Magnum, with a glance of his twinkling eye that made me shudder, swimming as it was in tears, vinegar,-and brine.
“‘Dear Winslow,’ murmured Alice, resting her hand on Currier’s shoulder, ‘will you give me >our arm?’
“And out they went, leaving me in a state of mind more easily imagined than descri bed.
“When I got out into the street, Charley,
— 1 don’t exactly know how I got there, for at that point is an hiatus in the memory of my youthful days, — I went down to Kimhall’s, and, shutting myself in a stall, cot
— well, obliviously intoxicated for the first time in my life. I am ashamed to acknowledge it; but my condition and state of mind demanded a period of forgetfulness, don’t you see? — a draught of the waters of Lethe, as it were.
“In .he morning I took the first train to Auburn, and did not again visit Rochester until Currier and Alice had been united five years, and rejoiced in several children. Mr. Magnam died a’;out ten years ago, and Currier got fully two-thirds of his wealth, and is richer than ever today. It might have been mine but for that detestable gherkin. I have hated the sight of a pickle ever since.”
“And no wonder,” I said.
BY MAUD LEYHAD.
Just where the hillside and meadow meet
As friends with firm-clasped hands, Brown with the suns of a hundred years.
The quaint old farm-house stands.
Through the open door you may catch a glimpse
Of the rafters brown and old,
Festooned with fruits of the orchard-trees
And the pumpkin’s rings of gold.
Before the house, like a dusty snake
Slow trailing his length of brown,
The road winds on to the scented wood
Away to the far-off town.
The lilacs have grown to the very roof;
And there, in their branches high,
A robin with back as brown as the earth,
And breast like a sunset sky,
Lightly swings on a bloom-crowned hough, and talki
To his mate with a gush of song,
As she sits on her eggs with her downy breast,
Contented the whole day long.
But at last in the dying light of day
The robin’s song is still,
And faint and far from the distant wood
Come the notes of the whip-poor-will.
Down where they hide in the long marsh grass
The frogs peep one by one,
And under the door-stone old and worn
The crickets’ song lias begun.
Spite of the breezes soft of the spring,
The night comes gray and chill; Though a rosy flush still lingers on
The brow of the distant hill.
Closed is the open door at last,
Shut out all pain and strife,
And before the open hearthstone sits
The farmer and his wife.
The good wife plies her needles till
Thetall old clock strikes nine;